Cradled in the Past of our Wanton Desire

I actually like this poem. This is a good poem. It captures what a lot of women feel and think, but is rarely expressed. There is a deep psychology to this work, and I think folks that don't take the time to understand people dismiss this poem too quickly. It is the simplicity, the vivid snapshot, and the even the personal aspect that make the poem good. I would never trust an MFA's opinion of poetry . . .they are too snotty and get stuck on stupid technicalities and miss the overall effect of poetry and art - in my opinion.

to paraphrase... "why so anonymous?"

No, it's the writing.

No, it's the writing.

Could it be that what offends is not so much the writing but that the writer is featured on the cover in "cheesecake" pose? Why oh why, Portfolio, did you do this? Tacky, tacky.

Poetry is art, plain and simple, and as with any form of art, it is subject to criticism. If an artist cannot take criticism, he or she should avoid putting any work into the public arena. It would be silly to think that one could create a work of art that everyone would like, and more ridiculous still to think that one's work could be touted as some of the best in the region and readers would blindly buy into that and throw rose petals at the feet of the artist. There are several things about this work that people are rightly and intelligently criticizing, from the pretentious, meaningless title to the mixed metaphors to the unoriginal phrases and sparse imagery. I doubt that the detractors who commented here feel empowered in doing so. More likely, they (like me) are probably expressing frustration that in an area bursting with unrecognized talent, something smug and condescending is featured as the best this region has to offer.

Perhaps for the next poetry issue (and the same goes for features on local music and visual artists), someone at PortFolio could take the time to cast a wider net and put some effort into finding truly fresh, unrecognized talent, rather than relying on those who contribute to one writing studio.

i like it. perhaps in a world where people spent more energy creating art instead of criticizing others' works we wouldn't have great monuments to stupidity like the 15 million dollars worth of man-made waterfalls going up in nyc. I realize that there are those in this world who feel some empowerment by leaving a negative mark. I suppose this is better than leaving your calling card unflushed in the rest area commode. But to those who legitimately have an emotive response, realize the poem worked as planned and let that inspire your own.
-bw

I would expand on the problem of the title, which sounds like the title of a bad romantic novel. It has a wonderful word, cradled, in it, and then does nothing with the word's connotation or the image it creates. In fact, none of the images in the poem is sustained. There is too much telling, and not enough showing - an elementary rule of poetry. An what about these romantic ideals that are abusive? Is that supposed to be personification? If so, what exactly are romantic ideals? Be specific indeed! This poem is all over the place - goddesses and queens are mixed up, and the images associated with them are stale. And one more thing: what's with "the idea of a perfected lover?" why not describe what that is instead of using yet another vague, but somewhat familiar phrase that the reader won't truly understand or be moved or surprised by.

"That's it folks" makes things so simple, a la Porky Pig, but poetry isn't simple. Specifically what I don't like about this poem: 1) the goddess/queens metaphorsthey don't mesh. Choose one and make it unify the poem. 2) Think about every word. "Sometimes" is so easy. "Another" way? How else does one do this? "Which is" are useless words. 3) Abstract ideas like "abused by romantic ideals" make the reader do the workand relinquish control of the poem's meaning to the reader. Be specific! 4) The title is one of those things that sounds good but doesn't really mean anything. What exactly IS "the pas of our desire"? What does this mean? Ultimately, what's wrong with the poem is: it has no heart. A cardinal rule: write what you know. There is a smug tone to this poem that is made more offensive by the poem's lack of craft. The character in this piece might be familiar, but the writer does not KNOW her. There is no connection other than a self-satisfied "that's not me." It is easy to point fingers at some pitiable being, but not so easy to give voice to one's OWN frailties.

Poetry is subjective! One either identifies with it as thought evoking or creative or they don't. That's it folks! While I disagree with the other comments, the most disappointing aspect to what they stated was that they didn't state anything specific about why they didn't like it. Rather, they used this as a forum to attack the poet and the poem. As a fellow poet, I am delighted to see this entry as one of the best poems in Hampton Roads. I believe the character in this piece is a person many of us have encountered and the poet illustrates this persona in a genuine and tangible light.

I realize poetry criticism is very subjective and I myself am not a poet, but I have to say that I've been to several readings in this area that featured insightful, thought provoking works, not what appears to be thinly veiled bitterness and self-victimization. The "goddess barfly"? Really?

Which is not to say that the entire feature wasn't good there are some beautiful works included. But as Anonymous mentioned, I do question a handful of the poems that you've deemed "some of the best poetry in Hampton Roads," including your cover model.

It truly is poorly done.

Ouch! But I have to agree.

This is really bad. As a poetry MFA student with a BA in Creative Writing, it offends me that Portfolio would choose this as one of the "best poems" of Hampton Roads. I sit in workshops every week with writers that are exponentially better than this. And that this particular writer would land the front page cover? What exactly are the editors over there thinking? Has anyone heard of Luisa Igloria? Tim Seibles? John Pineda? All Norfolk resident writers who trump this - hands down. Even within the issue there is poetry that has more depth than what you can imagine this particular writer is capable of imagining.
I'm apalled. No, I didn't submit any of my own work - but I'm in the writing community enough to know that this is not the shining example of Hampton Roads poetry that Portfolio makes it out to be.
Was the idea to use a "pretty face" to attract people to poetry? Sorry - that's not the way people who read and write poetry work. It actually has to be GOOD. No dice.